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Friday, June 18, 2010

Chillin' with my 3 1/2 Inch Company


“I know who is going to keep you company this week Mom!”
“Who?” I asked my little man who was staring right into my blue eyes just a few inches from my face.
And he exclaimed gladly, “The baby!”
The boys left just a few hours ago and will be gone for four days camping deep in the woods. And my son is right; just as baby is a big reason why I am choosing to skip out on this trip; he/she will be keeping me company this weekend.
Snug tight in my belly for another 5 ½ months me and baby are spending lots of time together. We spent the first minutes napping and then watching a movie. It was nice to just lounge and do nothing!
I’m taking advantage this weekend and doing lots of that. In addition, to a couple of other things, we are going to do some editing; I’m anxious to read and re-write the chapters of my book and yet I’m finding that now I am pregnant I’m a little extra emotional and I’ll need to run to the store for some more Kleenex before I begin.
I get teary eyed and overwhelmed with emotion when I think about how much my God loves me and all that He has done to demonstrate His love—but I know I don’t normally shed these many tears; so I am choosing to blame the added tears on pregnancy hormones.
Next, this baby is demanding a little bit more space and I had to break down and buy some maternity clothes and so we are going to spend some time re-organizing my closet. Putting away all my pre-pregnancy clothes for a few months in this very antique wardrobe treasure chest my husband bought me a few years ago and hanging up my new blossoming wardrobe. (It won’t be so glorious when I have to still wear it the weeks after baby arrives…I am not one of those women who bounces right back into her skinny jeans).
Then baby and I will be heading for a date with Grandma—my mom! We’ll see where baby wants to eat and then maybe some shopping and the theatre. Oooooo I can’t wait!!!!
In between that I am hoping to catch up on some phone calls and read some more of my new Francine Rivers book. I’m reading “A Lineage of Grace,” and it is FANTASTIC!!! I love how captivating eachstory line is—there are 5 stories and they are right out of the Bible….God is a great author and Francine does a wonderful job adding details that make you think deep.
So me and baby about 3 ½ inches of he or she will be chilling in the AC this hot summer weekend in AZ...keeping each other company. Between this growing belly and the occasional flip flops and poking sensations that I feel I can’t deny that he/she is here with me. As surreal as it may be and as tempted as I am to doubt that I am going to have another baby after all these years of questioning/praying/hoping…I am not dismayed.

You see, this past January I asked my close girlfriends to pray for me and our family; I knew that time was changing this late-20's body of mine that first bore children. I knew that I was content being a mother of two boys but Justin and I were praying about making things final after 7 years of trying to have a third baby. I burst into tears in front of my dear girlfriends as I spoke of the finality of this hope and realized that deep inside I did still indeed have a desire for another baby; yet I told God over and over that I never wanted to long for something that He did not have for me-so if the answer is no, I will accept it with joy!
Now 6 months later, and there is no denying that I am with child. As I lay quiet and resting this week, I heard His Word which spoke as a whisper in the deepest recesses of my mind and heart and I’m declaring this baby a miracle of God's power and love…
“This miracle will bring great honor to the LORD’s name; it will be an everlasting sign of his power and love.” (Isaiah 55:13)
Makes me ponder the things in our minds that we try to deny or cast away in unbelief…never allow yourself to fall into the temptation of unbelief. For Jesus told his friends how NOT to fall into temptation; and His words are intended for us as well today…pray! (Luke 22:46).
Continue to forgive us Father for our sin of unbelief and help us to BELIEVE.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

5-1/2 inches? It seems so surreal.......can't wait to hold God's precious gift :)